10 Things Not To Say To Adopted People

So who are your real parents?

My REAL parents… well, I have parents I don’t have real and fake parents. My birth parents gave birth to me and my adoptive family gave me care so I wouldn’t consider only one set my real parents.

Also, I don’t think you would like me to ask you who your real parents are if you had step parents.


 Which parents do you like better?

Well speaking for myself I have known my adoptive parents for twenty-something years and am just now meeting my birth family. So, I don’t have a favorite I have people that I am more comfortable with.

This is a disgusting question in the fact that why I would  (or anyone) want to answer a question where we are asked to pick a favorite. It is considered disrespectful to ask someone which parent who they like better.


How do you feel about being given up?

Some adoptees were not given up in the easiest of circumstances some were forced. This question is just easier to avoid. You don’t know the full circumstances of anyone’s specific adoption so asking how does it feel might be a very sensitive topic.

Oh, you’re adopted? I’m sorry.

Why are you sorry? Honestly, if I am not upset why should you be? Be adopted is a blessing and I got to live my life to the fullest potential.

You were adopted so young, how do you have issues?

I don’t know how I feel about a lot of things. If I have issues I am sure not going to talk about them with someone I don’t feel comfortable with.

Do you know why you were given up?

Yes, I do

No, I’m not talking about it

Is it weird with your family because your not their ‘own’?

Why am I not my mom’s own child did she not raise me? This question is essentially saying that because my parents didn’t conceive me that they aren’t my own.

So are you and your brother both adopted or is he your parents real kid?

We are both adopted

Again we are both my parents ‘own’ kids.

Do you think you’ll want kids of your own or will you just adopt to give back?

I am not discussing what I am going to do.

Give back why do I need to give back in that way can’t I do more in other ways. Why don’t you give back by adopting?

You look like your parents are you actually adopted? Maybe they are just messing with you.

Yes, I look like my parents but, that doesn’t mean I am biologically related to them. I’ve seen the papers, no it is not a joke.

Did I miss any? If so tell me in the comments.


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